first dates
& soulmates
The scholarship of smut, served with a side of strong opinions.
First Dates & Soulmates is a podcast for people who love romance unapologetically — even if you’re still hiding in your car to finish the steamy parts. Romance is the best-selling genre that props up the entire literary world, and it deserves to be taken seriously. We just don’t think “seriously” has to mean “without a lot of laughing.”
We Take This Seriously (Just Not Solemnly)
Fifty-one million units sold in a year. The most-read fiction genre on the planet. And people still call it a “guilty pleasure.” We wrote the essay explaining why that’s wrong — and why the genre deserves to be treated like the cultural force it actually is.
We Don’t Just Talk Tropes. We Build Frameworks.
Every trope gets the same treatment: taken apart, named, and mapped so you know exactly why it works when it works — and why it falls flat when it doesn’t.
The Himbo Archetype
Smart himbo, golden retriever himbo, himbo vs. jock: we break down what separates a real himbo… from a guy who’s just dumb.
The Friendship GAMBLE
The Identity Disco
Enemies to Lovers
actually doing.
Monster Romance
When it comes to minotaurs, aliens, and other humanoids, we map monster romance on the axes that matter: how softboi, how monstrous, how much it wants to eat you (in the fun way).
The Faking It Framework
Not just what’s trending on BookTok.
Romance is a genre worth taking seriously — the tropes, the craft, the cultural moment that made cozy monster romance explode during a global pandemic. We bring a feminist and queer-forward lens to everything we cover, which means we’ll love a book and tell you exactly what didn’t land. We’ll champion an author’s voice and explain why the third-act breakup needed another 30 pages to earn it.
Our recommendations are built on taste, not algorithm. Which means when we tell you a book is worth your time, we mean it.
Second Chance Romance Books
A second chance only works if you believe two things: the first relationship mattered, and whatever broke it has genuinely changed. These are the ones that earn both.
Rockstar Romance Books
There’s something about falling for a musician — the single lyric that changes everything, the late-night jam session, the thrill of being chosen from a crowd.
Paranormal Romance Books
Vampires, shifters, witches, ghosts, demons, and every darkly magical lover in between — but paranormal plays by one rule that sets it apart from fantasy.
Not sure where to start? Take our two-minute Romance Trope Quiz — we’ll match
you to the recommendation lists built for exactly what you’re in the mood for.
Meet Your Hosts
Two readers. Very different bookshelves. Somehow this works.
Nikki McKnight
she/her
Nikki reads over 800 romance novels a year, which is either inspiring or alarming depending on your perspective. By day she’s an operations strategist. By night she’s a gamer, a queer romance devotee, and a walking encyclopedia of pop culture connections that somehow always apply to whatever book they’re discussing. She is the designated hype woman. She will also tell you, calmly and with citations, when a film has failed its female characters. While Meg is yelling at her Kindle to get on with it, Nikki is savoring every single one of those 100 pages of pining. She would like more, actually.
Top tropes: grumpy x sunshine, bi-awakening with best friends, oblivious-on-both-sides yearning, enemies to lovers, vacation flings
Meg Casebolt
she/her
Meg writes romance novels under the pen name Bailey Seaborn — named after the two copywriters in The West Wing, yes she knows, yes she’s that much of a nerd. By day she runs Love At First Search, where she works as an AI discoverability strategist for small businesses. She brings the craft lens: story structure, trope mechanics, and a forensic interest in why certain tropes land and others don’t. She’ll explain exactly why a slow burn needs 300 pages to earn the payoff — and spend all 300 of them yelling “just kiss already” at her Kindle. She built a seven-part fake dating framework while waiting in line at Disneyland. This is just how her brain works.
Top tropes: waking up married, second chance, best friend’s brother, black cat/golden retriever, he falls first
Featured Episodes
Episode 82
Heated Rivalry: The TV MM Romance Making the Whole Internet Thirsty
Heated Rivalry has arrived, and the FDSM household is officially in its Hockey Butt Era! Andrea Jones joins Nikki & Meg to dive into the first two episodes of the MM hockey romance adaptation turning the internet into a collective thirst trap.
Episode 67
From Fake Boyfriends to Puckboys: Inside Eden Finley’s Sports Romance Universe
Nikki and Meg sit down with bestselling author Eden Finley to talk all things generational romance, character crossovers, and the chaos of collaborative writing. From her Fake Boyfriend series to Puckboy, Eden shares how she builds interconnected worlds where the HEAs don’t stop with one couple but they span generations.
Episode 21
Heartless by Elsie Silver: Tropes We Hate, Books We Love series
Nowhere on Meg’s TBR would you expect a nanny AND a surprise baby —two tropes she actively avoids. She read it anyway. Here’s why it worked despite every red flag she walked in with.
Featured Author Interviews
M.A. Wardell
Episode 70
Matt writes spicy queer rom-coms with a diverse representation of flawed and damaged characters who find healing through love.
Alexa Martin
Episode 39
Alexa is the award-winning author of romance & women’s fiction novels. Her books have been chosen by NPR & Amazon for best books of the year.
Jessica Topper
Episode 55
Jessica writes romantic women’s fiction about men who steal the stage and the women who steal their hearts.
